frederoxdev 2023-01-08 21:52
Enjoyed reading through this! I didn't expect something like this, will admit I had to google the definition for a couple words but otherwise well done!
Foon → Ludum Dare Explorer → LD52 → A Conversation With A Stranger
By adam-burt
| Category | Rank | Score | Count | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Overall | 504 | 3.34 | 34 | |
| Fun | 639 | 2.91 | 32 | |
| Innovation | 738 | 2.60 | 32 | |
| Theme | 519 | 3.51 | 34 | |
| Mood | 216 | 3.75 | 34 |
Enjoyed reading through this! I didn't expect something like this, will admit I had to google the definition for a couple words but otherwise well done!
That was well written, but I wanted to jump off the aircraft when the hero made me harass the poor woman with mindless chat.
I do like the twist. I think it's a great idea, that could be amazing with a bit more fleshing out. It does start out painting the narrator as a bit of a creep, with some of the locked choices rather than what I would say to a stranger. I think it could be more subtle that there's more going on so that the reveal has more punch.
Nice work!
i've catched those vibes of morning sleepy bus full of vague thoughts in the first part. the second part is hart breaking. well done, enjoyed reading!
My friend, this is really good writing! I really like the beginning, then the middle section with all the train of thoughts gets a bit less interesting and I felt like I was going to be disappointed, but the ending turned everything around and made for a worthwhile read. A couple times the dialogue choices felt a bit out of place, but overall quite fitting. Very nice work!
*"Ideas in your head are the only ever truly perfect things. Once you make them real, they cease to be perfect"*
*"You find yourself wishing, although wishes are for children."*
Since english is not my first language, I´m pretty impressed with the writing.
The story could have felt "moodier" if you had added some music, even if you didn´t make it yourself (but thats just a note without any consideration on the story or the voting itself)
But I really did like the story and actually played it twice to get different endings.
So a salute to you and your writing and world-building skills!
I really loved the way that the narrator communicated everything in ways that related to farming it really helped feel like both the person and the world were real! The twist took me off guard as well and leaves me wanting to to know more about the history of the characters. Very nice :)
I dedicated myself to a certain approach early on and then regretted it later (though I stuck with it).
Well written, really enjoyed it!
I really did not expect the twist, instantly engaged me! We'll keep trying :heart:
I really liked this one! Good story and mood. My only critique is that, especially in the beginning, the answers look like they're not really relevant ("...","hello","yes"...). Also, there's just one page where you need to scroll: it would be more elegant to split it in two pages. Good creative work.
Interesting take on the theme. Cool thing! Thanks for posting - This game is my introduction to "Twine". Gonna mess around with it soon, thanks! :D
Sometimes I love to read short novels like this. It has its own charm. Also I loved how you implemented the theme here.
Such a creative way to approach the theme! When reading it, I was very much reminded of Starship Titanic (excellent read). There were a few instances, where you were seemingly punished no matter what choice you made which was odd, but then again maybe very much intentional! At any rate, great writing and well done!
Thanks for a great story. It was really interesting to read and plot twist at the end was cool. Also I love the setting and imagined how everything works in this world. Great stuff!
Cool! I can imagine writing all the different paths etc must have taken ages. Your work made me look up Twine which I'd never heard of before, even though I also made a text-based game this LD (thanks for the review btw:)). I liked how you used the theme in a super non-obvious way, not directly to progress the story but to add something to it in a more subtle way
Very nice!! I really enjoyed the story and the writing. The "twist" was great and made me rethink the first half of the story.
Love this approach to the theme! I think this story is worth revisiting to make a more polished story without the time constraints.
A surprising turn on the theme, but really well written! Feels quite natural and feels like the choice change the story in fascinating ways
A simple game, but it worked well enough! It looked nice and it was interesting to read, well done!