FoonLudum Dare ExplorerLD53 → Special Delivery

Special Delivery

By alex-chertilin

View on ldjam.com

CategoryRankScoreCount
Overall10443.0651
Fun11692.5050
Innovation11252.5950
Theme7583.7451
Graphics8803.1750
Audio5033.3449
Humor8652.6248
Mood6123.5049

Comments

sean-spiggle 2023-05-01 16:23

when i click the link it just goes to a blank page.

evogengames 2023-05-01 16:53

I rate every game with Storks 5 stars! Well done! :smile:

alex-chertilin 2023-05-01 16:59

@sean-spiggle You can play the game right here. On the web page

tomas-selmeci 2023-05-01 18:35

Haha, we had the same idea but totally different execution. Nice Visual novel. Hope you had fun making this game. Good jon :)

triangle-point 2023-05-01 21:20

Love me a good visual novel and this one was great! Love the art and take on the theme! Great game!

matthewdrake 2023-05-01 23:38

First time seeing a visual novel while I've been rating games. This one had a really interesting premise, definitely going to have to check out the other options sometime.

alex-chertilin 2023-05-02 02:12

@matthewdrake Thank you for the feedback. There are two endings but they are very crucial .

radgegames 2023-05-02 04:14

Oh if only I could have a dollar for every hour I've spent inside of renpy games... =P great job!

sebhulhu 2023-05-02 06:03

Not sure why but loading never ends for me :-(

zephyr19 2023-05-02 06:07

Cool game and relaxing music! Not thought a visual novel game could come out of this theme.

tobiasd 2023-05-02 07:48

Very ambitious piece and nicely put together! Cool mood with music and graphics. It felt a bit "over-written" to me – I wanted to get to the central conflict sooner, with more interaction, less description. But I might not be used to visual novels :)

alex-chertilin 2023-05-02 09:08

Colleagues! Thank you so much for the feedback. I enjoyed to build the novel. The theme is very special for me. Now I’m happy you enjoyed the result.

answer21 2023-05-02 10:30

Very, very cool. I didn't expect anyone to make such a game, especially in the novel genre. I really liked it.

moonblast 2023-05-02 10:32

Have played several games about the birth of a child, this is my most satisfied. The graphics and atmosphere are appropriate, it is a good visual novel, also like the concept of retelling the old story in a game way

beebster-games 2023-05-02 13:46

It was not what I expected, pleasnatly so.

alex-chertilin 2023-05-02 13:55

If you don't mind please specify in the comments what sound played at the end? Victorious or sad? Thank you

weirdbitgames 2023-05-02 14:11

The thumbnail art is lovely! I wasn't expecting a narrative story-based game though! Most of the games I've seen on here are more arcadey or chaotic! This is interesing!

tofucat 2023-05-02 14:28

Artwork is amazing. Was interesting to come across a visual novel entry, I wasn't expecting that when I started playing. The music is very ominous at times. Nice!

fabula-rasa 2023-05-02 15:38

This is a nice story. I have a pondering though (spoilers follow, beware): in my game, Leo died during delivery. From the choices I got during the story (which weren't that many - could be more to feel more interactive), I don't really see which one would affect that outcome. I'd love to know!

The modified photo backgrounds are nice, although I think it would be better if they all would be modified with same filters (would produce more consistent art). And, as the text background is semi-transparent, the characters really should have legs :laughing:.

It's a nice and unique entry. Tremendous amount of work!

I found a visual bug. In one place, the text is a bit too long, and it covers the small text area at the bottom. Here:

Screenshot_13.jpg

alex-chertilin 2023-05-02 15:58

@fabula-rasa Thank you for the detailed feedback. Indeed, the story is pretty cloudy... Decisions were made lead to different outcomes. But there is opportunity to resist the plot. Different graphics intended to make different impressions because the same reasons. Consistency suffered as story's characters. Next time I will care about legs more, I hope I'd have enough time;) Yes, this bug exists because I wanted all the list on the one page. I will tune UI better.

congeesetador 2023-05-02 18:02

This was a very interesting take on the theme, I was not expecting a story to be released as a game, but it was a really nice story. The graphics and audio were amazingly made, and I love how you can interact with the story with the different dialogue choices. This is a great game! Keep up the good work!

bashem 2023-05-02 21:21

Very nice idea. The story is indeed really intriguing and we've got chills while realizing how weird the story was getting. It feels a bit too overwritten for a quick contest like this tho. Anyway, good job!

paul-avallone 2023-05-03 04:07

Nice to see a different take on the theme. I with there was less time between choices. Sometimes it felt like reading a short story rather than playing a game but I don't play visual novels very often. Very moody. The music and art fit well. Good job.

veralos 2023-05-03 09:25

Interesting concept for a game, and nice creative use of the "delivery" theme. Not sure how much of the plot was original vs taken from the short story, but it was certainly a fascinating ride. I like the use of tense music and the semi-realistic backgrounds. The character designs felt a bit too cheery for the tone of the story though.

sodoj 2023-05-03 11:02

This was a nicely done visual novel! Very well written with awesome artwork! Almost wished I wanted a child!

georgy 2023-05-03 16:10

This game is a real find.

johnsensei 2023-05-03 23:12

I like it when people do visual novels for Ludum Dare. It may be looked down upon, but I support it. A piece of feedback I got on a Ludum Dare visual novel was that it needed more interaction from the player. I think that's true for this project as well. There's great art and atmosphere. Is there a way to involve the player more?

alex-chertilin 2023-05-04 06:53

@sean-spiggle @evogengames @johnsensei @georgy @sodoj @veralos @paul-avallone @bashem @congeesetador @fabula-rasa @tofucat @weirdbitgames @beebster-games @moonblast @answer21 @radgegames @tomas-selmeci @triangle-point @matthewdrake Thank you all guys. It’s an honour to participate in the Jam with you. You are the great!

xhadie 2023-05-05 15:13

Congratulations to your entry! The story felt honestly a bit uncanny and scary, not sure if you were going for this haha! You could try to work a bit on the story-telling and built-in more user-interaction. After some time it gets a bit daunting to read so much. But for an early execution well done, keep it up :)!

olddog 2023-05-07 15:34

cool game !nice graphic and music,,It is a awsome visual novel game(sorry I am not a fan of this kind ) good job