caryoscelus 2017-04-29 21:49
Heh, it feels like the theme is a bit of spoiler.
The saving bandwidth excuse doesn't sound very plausible.
A bit of transitions would help to understand how time passes. Without them i sometimes get expression that chatting happens during the lesson, but then someone says good night.
The "revelation" moment feels kinda abrupt. The conclusion doesn't follow from essay unless some part of it is skipped. Password scene makes me cry about how your characters approach security O_o
In overall, it seems to me that such a story would play better if it would be longer - to setup characters and only then make revelations. Still, nice job as always.
It would also help if actions would have some long-time response, but perhaps it isn't highest priority for this story.